new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
This show inspires me to have sex in space
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
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