I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
Khloé Kardashian Finally Speaks Out About The Tristan Thompson Cheating Scandal
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
15 Porn Memes You’re Only Allowed To Laugh At If You’re Over 18
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF