Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Randomize