Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
Randomize