I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
Randomize