honey bunches of taint.
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize