I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
