umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
Randomize
