Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
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