i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
i want to swaddle you in tequila
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real