Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
Randomize