My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
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