I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
Randomize
