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WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
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