would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Why on earth are you answering my texts promptly? Thought for certain you'd be caught up in some ridiculous orgy by this time.
I'm that good.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
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You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
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I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...