I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
Randomize