I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
Randomize