you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
Randomize
