So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize
