i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
Randomize
