i just pissed myself at work. maybe they'll buy the old coffee spill trick
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Randomize