Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
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