I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
