He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
I introduced my face to asphalt last night. They didn't get along.
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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