I think i peed on brittanys purse
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Randomize
