Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(845): View more from New York

How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?

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(516): View more from New York

Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice

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(203): View more from Connecticut

Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.

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(507): View more from Minnesota

currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.

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Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Read it at the TFLN blog
(831): View more from California

Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song

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(714): View more from California

Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.

(1-714): View more from California

This is why we're friends.

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(712): View more from Iowa

Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.

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(317): View more from Indiana

We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies

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