I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
They are going to name an STD after you.
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Randomize
