Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
So squirting runs in the family.
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
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Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
When did angry sex become our thing?
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Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
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