I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in