I feel like abortions should bother me more
I seem to have left my pride at pride
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"