p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
They are going to name an STD after you.