Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(510): View more from California

We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.

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(510): We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP. http://tfl.nu/sbka

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(361): View more from Texas

What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?

(1-361): View more from Texas

These are the tickets we got last night.

(361): View more from Texas

Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?

(1-361): View more from Texas

Yes...yes you did.

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(361): What are these yellow papers in the kitchen? (1-361): These are the tickets we got last night. (361): Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear? (1-361): Yes...yes you did. http://tfl.nu/myva

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(250): View more from British Columbia

i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.

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(250): i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay. http://tfl.nu/ht4h

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(+32): View more from Belgium

We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.

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(+32): We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers. http://tfl.nu/61q6

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(+27): View more from South Africa

My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.

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(+27): My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos. http://tfl.nu/d1hj

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(970): View more from Colorado

She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.

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(970): She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat. http://tfl.nu/yazk

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(816): View more from Missouri

votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads

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(816): votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads http://tfl.nu/utdd

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(704): View more from North Carolina

all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.

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(704): all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back. http://tfl.nu/s19b

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(479): View more from Arkansas

We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe

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(479): We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe http://tfl.nu/vo7i

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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.

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(610): Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole. http://tfl.nu/uyw0

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(419): View more from Ohio

I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?

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(419): I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives? http://tfl.nu/8b2p

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(714): View more from California

The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!

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(714): The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to! http://tfl.nu/8lua

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(323): View more from California

We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.

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(323): We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40. http://tfl.nu/6iay

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(202): View more from Washington, DC

I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...

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(202): I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him... http://tfl.nu/dz07

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(815): View more from Illinois

This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me

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(815): This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me http://tfl.nu/y5v6

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