she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
Fuck appropriateness.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
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