Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.