i can juggle bunnies
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
25 Porn Addicts Admit Their Biggest Pet Peeves
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents