Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
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I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
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He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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