i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
Randomize
