I cockslap morals
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
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Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
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