Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
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