And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
You dont lie about slip and slides
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
