Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
We don't watch enough power rangers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
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