Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(303): View more from Colorado

last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar

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(303): last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar http://tfl.nu/1mlv

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(814): View more from Pennsylvania

In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.

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(814): In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words. http://tfl.nu/vqcb

Replies (25) Good night (1119) Bad night (2480) Order T-Shirt
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(919): View more from North Carolina

Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?

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(919): Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen? http://tfl.nu/378f

Replies (18) Good night (2055) Bad night (575) Order T-Shirt
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(612): View more from Minnesota

I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles

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(612): I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles http://tfl.nu/ysmu

Replies (19) Good night (1219) Bad night (4924)
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(989): View more from Michigan

News Flash: Turtles are cuter than Jesus.

(1-989): View more from Michigan

Congrats on damning at least 10 generations of your offspring to hell with just one text message. Way to start your morning off right.

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(989): News Flash: Turtles are cuter than Jesus. (1-989): Congrats on damning at least 10 generations of your offspring to hell with just one text message. Way to start your morning off right. http://tfl.nu/jho0

Replies (22) Good night (4429) Bad night (851)
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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.

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(724): Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part. http://tfl.nu/1dsi

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(703): View more from Virginia

But I thought everyone had breakup sex?

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(703): But I thought everyone had breakup sex? http://tfl.nu/04j7

Replies (24) Good night (5013) Bad night (1368) Order T-Shirt
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(714): View more from California

he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick

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(714): he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick http://tfl.nu/v3uh

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(860): View more from Connecticut

MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!

(860): View more from Connecticut

I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo

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(860): MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!! (860): I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo http://tfl.nu/vjys

Replies (13) Good night (8179) Bad night (787)
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(508): View more from Massachusetts

There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.

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(508): There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him. http://tfl.nu/gfad

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(425): View more from Washington

...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.

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(425): ...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense. http://tfl.nu/ojne

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(401): View more from Rhode Island

U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.

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(401): U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am. http://tfl.nu/s547

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(847): View more from Illinois

She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night

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(847): She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night http://tfl.nu/5dv7

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(828): View more from North Carolina

I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.

(1-828): View more from North Carolina

Did someone catch you and fuck you?

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(828): I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes. (1-828): Did someone catch you and fuck you? http://tfl.nu/onw1

Replies (1) Good night (912) Bad night (341) Order T-Shirt
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(301): View more from Maryland

A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.

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(301): A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it. http://tfl.nu/f0y3

Replies (3) Good night (337) Bad night (75)

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