Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.