I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
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