I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
