Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Randomize
