Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Randomize