That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
you win again, gameday.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?