STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
