Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
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