how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
Brb crying the tears of my youth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
Randomize