If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Randomize
